This one is for you...

I still remember the date, although the reason might well be different one. 23rd July of this year. I was in Buffalo, waiting for some friends to arrive. Nothing to do at 2 in the night, I came out for a smoke. Had burnt down a couple and was into my third, when my friends came. Along with them was a girl whom I knew. Dont know if I could call her a friend then, an acquaintance would be a better word. "Cigarettes are bad....throw it", she said. "I'm not addicted, just a couple over the weekends", I replied. Matter ends, it was late in the night and we went home.

Next day, she visited the place where I was staying. Saw the cigarette pack on the table, "Very bad..." and down goes the pack in the garbage can. The smart-ass that I am, I replied: "I will lift the pack from the can once you go. Cigarettes won’t be spoilt." She took the pack from the can and started emptying the pack- one cigarette at a time.

It took me a min. to realize what she just did. Had it been done by any of the guys around me, they would have got a mouthful. Had it been done by any of the girls I knew, I would have told them to mind their own business and here was a girl, whom I had met just 6-7 times before, emptying the whole pack of cigarettes in front of my eyes into garbage. Who is she? What problem does she have of my smoking? Why does it matter to her? Being the "aman-parast" guy that I am, I kept these thoughts to myself. Didn’t say a word, admired her audacity and moved on.

A couple of days later, I got a mail from her citing the reason about her behavior and a very valid reason that was. Reason cited and fair enough, I thought. Life wasn't really a bed of roses for me at that time. Frustration was at it's peak and sometimes cigarettes helped relieve it. I wasn’t addicted then and was confident I won’t be addicted in the future. Another smart-ass answer from me, now that I reflect.

Her reply was, “Believe me. Frustrations will come and go but once you get hooked on to cigarettes, it’s very difficult to let it go.” 3 ½ months later, now that I look back at that statement. She was right. Coz this smart-ass is now addicted. Started with once a week went on to a couple over the weekends, then alternate days and right now am at a stage where I burn down a couple, maybe more daily. You might say, that 2-3 per day is not that bad...but for the craving that comes with it and the "Ye Dil Maange More" thoughts. I still have restrained myself from carrying the pack to my workplace, but am not sure how long will that last.

So this post is dedicated to her. I can definitely consider her my friend now. This one is to let her know, that had I listened to her then, life would have been different now. This one is to say to her, that she was right all along and I just gave some really smart-ass answers then. That’s what I was and that’s what I still am… “A Smart Ass”. It’s never too late to change though. Is it?
It would have been much easier, had I done it 4 months ago. It is going to be difficult now… but I will!!!

Pushing the thanks-giving season a little ahead of schedule let me thank her and everyone else who have discouraged me from smoking. Giving up wont come easily. It will be a gradual process but the process will end soon.

Took a lot of time to write this... it's time to light another cigarette.
hehe...just kidding!!!

thanks once again!!!

-Smart Ass